My services

I've listed the services that I provide below, along with information about how I suggest working with clients and my fees. Elsewhere, you can find information about what is ceremony and when and why may a ceremony be relevant for you and what to expect at a ceremony.

My services include:

TRANSITION BLESSINGS and RITES OF PASSAGE ceremonies
NAMINGS and blessings for AFFIRMING YOUR GENDER IDENTITY
Spiritual COUNSELLING
WEDDING BLESSINGS

I'm happy to consider any proposals for anything else that you might have in mind where it may be appropriate for me to be involved. Simply get in touch with me to chat through your ideas. There are some things that I may not be able to help with, although if this is the case, I may be able to suggest someone who can!

Transition blessings and rites of passage ceremonies

A transition ceremony honours and celebrates your "coming home" to being you, to being whole. It offers a space to acknowledge the beautiful and sacred step that you've taken, to give thanks for who you are, and to ask for your protection, good health and happiness going forward. A ceremony also gives an opportunity for others to welcome you and publicly announce their support for you, and can play an important role in helping you to move from one period of your life into a new stage – a rite of passage no less significant than moving into adulthood or getting married (I've included a little information about the meaning of a "rite of passage" here).

There is no fixed form that a transition ceremony need take, other than being something that feels right for you. I will discuss any ideas that you may have, and will draft a proposed ceremony that we can talk through and further adapt as you wish. Typically this will include a mix of readings, prayers, songs and a "ritual" of some sort, typically to mark symbolically the step that you've taken (e.g. by physically stepping over a ribbon, or lighting one candle from another to mark your moving from the "old" you to the new). This doesn't mean that the ceremony need be overly formal, involve lots of people, or fit with any particular "religious" way of doing things – ceremonies that are unconventional are often among the most beautiful; for example, those that are held outdoors at sunrise, or in the comfort of your own home.

To talk through possibilities, please give me a call. My contact details are below. You might also like to take a look at an example ceremony.

A blessing may also be given before you transition, typically on a one-to-one basis, or shared with a small number of people who are close to you. This may take the form of a simple blessing and prayer for your safe coming from one place in your life to being at peace in your new body, asking that you are lovingly held through the final steps of your transition, and (optionally) a laying on of hands. A blessing may be offered anywhere, for example, in a hospital or at your home.

Namings and blessings for affirming your gender identity

Your name has been specially chosen by or for you. It isn't just a label, but a very real part of you– what others call you, and integral to your identity. A name blessing recognises and honours your chosen name, allows others to celebrate your identity, and can form an important part of coming into wholeness and happiness for "coming home" to who you really are.

A naming ceremony can be very simple, and need not involve many people, even just yourself and me. It offers a moment of quiet for a prayer, for giving thanks and celebarting your identity, or whatever is felt to be appropriate. One or two meaningful readings, and a way of marking the blessing, such as a laying on of hands, might also form a part of such ceremonies.

Blessings open up sacred space and are always uniquely personal, inviting divine presence and support to "hold" you. Giving thanks for who you are and asking for your safe, happy, and fulfilling growth is always very nourishing and precious, an important and touching part of any naming ceremony.

If you would like to ask for a name blessing or discuss a possible ceremony that can otherwise affirm the gender that you identify with, please get in touch with me. My contact details are below. I look forward to hearing from you.

Fees

My fees are as below. I usually suggest that a deposit of 35% is paid ahead of a ceremony being held, where possible, and will also pre-agree any travel expenses before committing to them. Where I can, I'm happy to offer brief time by telephone at no charge in association with any service that I'm engaged for.

My standard base fees are as follows:

I do offer concessions for folks on low or no income.

Excepting pre-transition blessings, these fees allow for up to two 1–2 hour preparation meetings ahead of a ceremony (up to three discussions and a walkthrough for weddings), along with my time for writing and conducting the ceremony. The fees do not include venue hire, although I can assist with this if required. Expenses are included for travel within my normal work territory (East Sussex, Essex, Greater London, Kent, Surrey and West Sussex); these will need to be discussed and added for travel elsewhere (although considering reasonable options). I am happy to travel virtually anywhere in the UK or Europe to hold a ceremony, and will also consider travelling elsewhere, subject to cost and time constraints.

How I suggest working with clients

There are two main aspects to my ministry: creating, hosting and supporting ceremonies, and spiritual counselling.

In either case, I will first aim to understand a little about what you feel you are looking for, as well as to spend a little time for both of us to test whether I am the right person for the job. If you feel it's right, I'll then ask if you can take a look at my terms for working together and agree our fees, as a basis for a working together. These are designed to protect your interests as much as mine and are obviously important in any professional work.

An initial meeting may be face-to-face or, very often, held by phone, Zoom, Whereby or Skype as you prefer. For simple blessings, only a brief consultation may usually be necessary before arranging the ceremony, and sometimes this can be done spontaneously. Simple ceremonies might also involve no more than another brief conversation.

In the case of counselling, I will usually then suggest a trial call and we can set a time for this. This. This will give you a sense of what counselling is about and so whether it may be appropriate to arrange further calls (in some cases, just one call may at any rate be sufficient).

Otherwise, where a ceremony is concerned, I will set about drafting a suggested ceremony for you to review. This will very likely involve writing something specifically for you, such as a prayer, poem or brief message. Sometimes, you may wish to be involved in putting together content for the ceremony as well, and of course I will do my best to accommodate whatever you wish. I will put something in writing for you to read through and make your comments on, and in some cases, will arrange to talk through anything that may need explaining. The parts that you and others play in the ceremony will be very clear, with any words to be spoken written down for you and prompted by me on the day.

In the case of weddings and more substantial ceremonies, I will typically arrange more than one time when we can have a full opportunity to discuss your needs, usually after proposing some questions and other matters that you might want to consider, if you have particular thoughts about these (for example, in the case of a wedding blessing, what vows you wish to take, what readings might be appropriate). The aim of this preparation is to understand what's right and meaningful for you and to ensure that I can propose a ceremony that will be pefectly matched for you. It also gives you a chance to consider options that I can propose, and to properly become clear about how you would like the ceremony to be formed.

What I may not be able to help with

I don't guarantee to be able to help with every request that's put to me. Sometimes this may be for a very practical reason, such as my not being available at the time a ceremony is planned or when I believe that a colleague may be much better suited to helping than myself. However, on other occasions, this will be due to a feeling (or leading) that I have that I'm not the right person to help, and won't necessarily be something that can be rationalised. I try to be led by my heart as much as possible.

Nonetheless, I will always reflect very carefully on any request that is made to me, and like to say that it's normally the case that I do feel that it's right to offer my assistance. On the odd occasion when I don't feel led this way, I should usually be able to point you in the direction of someone who I believe might be able to help.

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